Thought I'd use this thread as a WIP for my experimental short film I decided to do. Did the drawings in sketchbook pages, reckon there are 10 scenes all in all, doing a scene a day. Done the first 2. Here:
I always like that trick of using lots of small independent loops to create a busy environment. However, I noticed that if all moving things (except the main characters) are loops I get a bit jaded soon. Maybe there should be more one-shot actions here and there, and/or maybe have loops which start and stop at some rest position which can be timed differently so to create pauses of different length. All this to cover the repetetivity a bit.
Also I think the first two scenes suffer from being crowded. All elements are distributed evenly over space. They could do with some more overall composition and a dynamic between crowded and empty areas.
The opposite is true for the last two scenes: they look empty, and there's no real center of composition. I'd suggest to just re-arrange the elements a bit. (Also take care to not put your main action too close to the frame borders!)
And the clouds moving on a square path really cracked me up!
Awesome! The third scene reminds me of Mario 3. :D I'm guessing there will be music in the final version, (because your work is usually really music oriented)?
Slowtiger > Man, you always have such great notes, thanks If it were another kind of project I think I may make changes, but I'm doing this as a personal project with the aim of just playing / not really stressing about too much / as a way to relax, so I think I may just keep things as is. I really do think your suggestions are correct though - some of the scenes are a bit busy, the third scene could use a bit more focus - however, I'm happy to keep things the way they are for this
Iwaxana > I've just been playing Super Mario Bros. 3! Recently got myself a Nintendo 2DS and have actually been playing SMB 1 (and Zelda: Ocarina of Time which is great). After I did this scene I think I got SMB 3. The old games are pretty challenging! Yo. Have always been such a fan of SMB 1. Something magical about that. Some family friends recently got me this nice shirt when they visited recently:
Anyways, here are some of the drawings for 'Kopistilo' below. As you can see, didn't change much from the original drawings. Straight scan in, cut up in Photoshop, layer script export to PNG files, import into AS - animate.
Synthsin75 > ah man ai lol'd when I read your comment. First time I've seen it like that. Now that you mention it, it could also be like hands on his head. Cannot unsee.
Yeah, certain parts did read like hands holding head too. I thought the first closeup was of the pet-like thing at first. Some of the pitfalls of working rather abstract and in black and white (where you don't really have the opportunity to contrast things like white eyes and white background). Maybe a medium to close shot that clearly shows some background element pass behind the character early on would show that the eyes are not holes.
Anyway, I kind of think my read on the character made it a bit more interesting, and that is a strength of more abstract design.
having a chill time with this.
